Im not gonna lie. I miss those three little words. I miss knowing that someone loved me as much as i loved them. That is of course, if he ever really did love me. Well, i know he loved me but was he IN LOVE with me? i never really thought there was a difference until he and i broke up. I thought i was in love with him. I thought i would spend the rest of my life with him get married and have kids. But the thought of all that scared him. ultimately pushed him away until he was no longer within my reach. I loved him. I still do till this day. But, i was never in love with him and i know this now. I know this because to me, you cant be in love with someone who isnt in love with you also. I believe that to be in love it takes two people two hearts and an undeniable passion. He and i just did not have that. We had lust. We had familiarity. We started off as lovers which to me was the problem. We were never friends. We always just had a lust for each other. When i fall IN LOVE i know its going to be with someone who i was friends with first and foremost. And that will eventually turn into lust which leads to love. Till that day comes, I'll love myself. And i will put myself out there not being afraid of what love has to offer. Im not scared to get hurt because i know that getting hurt means learning lessons. life lessons that we all need to have a successful relationship. Ive had good relationships and ive had not so good. But i have learned from them all. And i will take that knowledge with me wherever i go. <3
